Make Way for Theology

Originally written: July 28, 2017

Romans 5

“In the beginning,” Moana’s grandmother recounts how things came to be. She explains how the mother island, Tefiti, had life itself, and how “Tefiti shared it with the world.” This creation account is obviously based off Genesis, where we read of how our Father gave life; He calls for His creation to “be fruitful and multiply…subdue the earth… and have dominion” in order that life, which is knowing God, might be shared. But when Adam fell, death entered the world. In that day, Adam and Eve were cut off from life; they weren’t able to know God in an intimate way. Moana also portrays this fall. The First Adam, Maui, transgresses against the giver of life and is cast out of Tefiti’s presence—banished to an island. It is because Maui tried to usurp Tefiti, thinking that he could steward the heart better than the goddess, that there was enmity between Maui and Tefiti. And it is because of Maui’s sin that the rest of creation groans. We see the consequences on Motunui: no fish and dying trees. The demigod, who had once subdued the earth and brought dominion over every living thing to all men, also imputed the death and the consequence of his sin to all men. And yet, this is not even the worst part of Maui’s sin. The goddess who was once known to give life became known as Te Kā. Because of Maui’s sin, humans could only know Tefiti by the characteristic of her burning wrath: Te Kā. Similarly, the Bible tells us that it is because of sin that there is enmity between God and man. And for those who have become futile in their thinking and their foolish hearts darkened, they will mainly experience and know God for His wrath. It is only through Jesus that we can know and experience an aspect of God that is not His wrath. It is only through Jesus that we can be reconciled to our Father. Even though Moana has her own set of failings, her character is meant to point us to the personhood and role of Jesus Christ. When Te Kā’s wrath was set on destroying Maui (the scene where Maui’s hook was fully damaged, and Te Kā raised her hand to smash him), Moana stepped forward to take his place. She passed through the waters (resembling the wrath that was poured out on the Egyptian armies) to endure the full wrath of the frantically crawling Te Kā. And it was through Moana that the wrath of Te Kā was appeased. This propitiation even brought reconciliation to those who were once enemies. Tefiti, who once had her wrath set on destroying Maui, now shines her smile upon him. Because of her affections for Moana, she blesses Maui with a new hook. Likewise, it is only because of Christ that we too find favor in the sight of the Father. It is because of Christ that we are lavished with good gifts and brought into His kingdom. He even uses us to advance His kingdom to the ends of the earth. What a beautiful illustration of the First Adam being redeemed to once again have dominion with the last Adam as they voyage to the ends of the earth.

Matthew 28

Whether it’s fear or complacency, the church has always struggled to advance the Gospel. The realities of persecution, rejection, and failure have caused many saints to abandon missions. There is no telling what will happen if we go out into the unknown– out past Jerusalem and into Judea, Samaria, and the ends of the earth. Fear has kept the church from being occupied with missions. Another reason why the church has struggled to advance the Gospel faithfully is because she has become complacent. When God grows ministries and brings about unity, it is easy to become comfortable. But it becomes sinful when this comfort leads to apathy. The mission of the church is to “Go” and make disciples of all nations. To forsake this mission is to forsake our purpose and identity. Praise God we are not alone. When the Lord Jesus commissioned us to go, He said that He would be with us always, even to the end of the age. And then He poured out His Holy Spirit. His presence is enough to overcome both fear and complacency. In a very similar way, we see the island of Motunui struggle with complacency and fears. Lin Manuel Miranda’s Where You Are is literally about being comfortable with where you are. The islanders of Motunui sing of their contentment with what is here and express their apathy for what’s out there. Their desire to stay in Motunui is also driven by fear. Moana’s father is adamant that no one goes beyond the reef. He doesn’t even want Moana to go near the water, as he fears for her life. Understandably so: we hear the story of how his friend died when they attempted to go beyond the reef. And this fear has driven him to abandon his people’s purpose and identity; he has abandoned voyaging. Right as he is about to go and burn all of the boats, he is interrupted by the death of his mother. It is on her deathbed that she commissions Moana to “Go.” And when Moana is uncertain, her grandmother assures her, “There is nowhere you can go that I won’t be with you,” even to the end of the age. And right when Moana responds in obedience to the call, we see the grandmother’s spirit (in the form of a manta ray) go out from the island with Moana. Moana is a call for people to be who they are truly meant to be—to do what they are truly meant to do. For some, it is a call to voyage, but for others it is a call to missions.

Another Cool Parallel

One of my favorite scenes in Moana is when she is journeying to find Maui, and her boat tips over. As she grabs on to the flipped boat, she says: “Ocean, can I get a little help?” And at that moment, lightning strikes and a storm ensues. As she attempts to flip the boat herself, she continues to cry out for help. And almost as a response, a gigantic wave knocks her out, and the screen goes black. She wakes up on some island and immediately runs to the waters. She puts her hands on her hip and angrily yells, “Ummm, What? I SAID help me…and wrecking my boat, not helping,” she tries to kick the water but instead lands on her butt. “Fish pee in you…all day,” she tries to insult the water. And then right as she turns around, she notices that she has landed right where she needs to be: on Maui’s island. How often, do we as Christians look at our own circumstances, and when we cry out to God, he sends a storm? And we usually look at these moments of trials and suffering, and we doubt the goodness (or even the existence) of God. And yet, He is just so good to put us exactly where we need to be. These hardships are meant to shape us into Christlikeness.

Moana and LOTR

I probably shouldn’t call these parallels. They are more so just similar elements that make me think of LOTR when I am watching Moana. When grandma Tala is explaining how things came to be…I could almost hear Lady Galadriel narrating how things came to be. And there is a very similar premise: basically, the protagonist has to journey with another to the ends of the earth, past the lava, and place this small token of power there. In the Fellowship, when Isildur finally takes possession of the ring, he is shot off of his horse by an arrow, and the ring floats to the bottom of the waters where it remains for generations. Likewise, once the greedy Maui steals the heart of Tefiti, he is blasted from the sky, and we see the heart float to the bottom of the ocean where it remains for generations. And whether you want to call it “precious” or “shiny”, this symbol of power is sought out by a very disturbing looking creature. And then even the strategy to restore the heart is similar to the strategy of destroying the ring. Frodo’s friends attempted to divert Sauron’s gaze by keeping his attention on the black gate. In the same way, Maui was used to distract Te Kā so that Moana could make it to Tefiti. But both of these diversions were not enough; when you talk to LOTR haters, they always bring up the fact that they should have just used the eagles the entire time. Like, why couldn’t the eagles just drop the ring in Mordor? And you kind of wonder the same thing about Moana. Like when Te Kā finally realizes what Moana is doing, she ignores Maui, and goes after her. And that’s when we see the ocean basically carry Moana to where she wants to go. Like why couldn’t the eagles and the ocean just spare us from these movies entirely? But what most fail to realize is that it is not just about the end goal. There is a need for a journey, and growth, and fellowship. It is these elements that make people appreciate the beauty of the author more. Isn’t that the same way our Author works? When I look at this story, I know that He can easily just take us to glorification. Why leave us here to be sanctified? Why leave us here to experience trials and suffering? Why not just invoke some eagles and ocean, skip the sanctification, and go right to glory? Maybe it’s so that we might know and experience our Author more fully.

5 Harmful Things You Can Say to a Single Guy

Originally written: June 25, 2019

Christians love a good love story. And more than that, Christians love to be a part of a good love story (even if it’s not their own). In every church that I have ever been a part of, there have been self-identified match makers. And this is not a bad thing. I am not writing this to discourage match making; I believe that there is a time and place for this. I have simply found that much of the match making culture that I have seen in the church is completely devoid of the sentiments that Paul shares in 1 Corinthians 7.

What do we do with 1 Corinthians 7? This is that passage where Paul wishes that all were like him: single. Often times, we go straight to verse 26 where it says: “In view of the present distress,” and completely dismiss the entire passage by claiming that these instructions were specific to that time. And while there is certainly an argument there, I just want to make sure that we aren’t throwing out the baby with the bathwater. My intent is simply to use 1 Corinthians 7 as a light to expose that much of the language we currently use in the church is unhelpful at best and anti-biblical at worst.

In the following, I will share what was said, when it was said, their good intentions, my immediate thoughts, and how we should view it in light of Scripture.

“You’re really godly. We need to get you a wife.”

A few years ago, I was sitting at a table with a group of brothers. I had just finished testifying to the Lord’s work in my life, and I could tell that whatever I just said had really encouraged the table. One brother just burst out: “You’re really godly. We need to get you a wife.”

I know that this brother was well intentioned. He was merely trying to encourage me. He saw some good in my life, and then wanted to suggest that I was deserving of something good. However, I found this comment to be extremely hurtful.

So, now that you find me to be godly, you now think that I’m deserving of a wife? As though my godliness qualifies me to be married? Or as though I have done enough to make it to the “next level” of Christianity?

My brother was simply trying to recognize faithfulness, and acknowledge that faithfulness ought to be blessed with something good. And marriage is good. But, so is singleness. Singleness is a good blessing from the Lord. Might we cultivate a spirit like Paul in 1 Corinthians 7:8, and when we see godly character say: “It is good for them to remain single.”

“I’ve got a wife for you.”

If I had a nickel for every time someone came up to me, and said: “I’ve got a wife for you.” I have heard this exact phrasing on multiple occasions. But more often, I have heard, “Brother, I have a sister that I think that you should consider.”

There was a season where it felt like, every week, someone would come up to me and tell me this. And I know that the brothers and sisters who have told me this love me, care for me, and hold my character in high regard. And again, they just want to see me blessed with a good thing. But being someone who is intentional about everything that I do, I’ve actually been quite unsettled by this.

Wow, I am flattered that you hold me in such high regard, and want to look out for me. But if you really knew me (enough to make such a big suggestion), you would know that I am actually not looking.

The issue that I take is not that someone is offering a suggestion of who I should pursue. I think that there is a place for this. What I have found to be harmful is the fact that people just assume that I am looking for someone to pursue when I have never expressed my desires to them. If someone were to be openly searching for a good thing, then I think it is appropriate for brothers and sisters to be helpful. But in my case, I had never expressed such desires (partly because I felt genuine contentment in my singleness and partly because I had my eye on a very godly girl who I was patiently waiting for). And so, I think that it would be better to just assume that, unless he has expressed his desires to be married, the single brother is content in remaining where he is. 1 Corinthians 7:24 says, “So, brothers, in whatever condition each was called, there let him remain with God.” Unless expressed otherwise (which I think could and should be a common thing), we ought to assume that a single person desires to remain as they are. And if you’re really curious, you don’t actually have to just assume; I think that an appropriate question to ask, prior to even making a suggestion, is: “Are you desiring to be in a relationship right now?”

“What’s her name?”

The Lord had just saved one of my friends. I was ecstatic! I went up to a brother at my church, and said, “I’ve got some really good news! I’ll have to tell you about it later.” To which, this brother replied: “What’s her name?”

I’ve actually had two brothers say this to me. And one of those times, I actually was about to tell him about a girl. That time, there was a bit of a shock factor: “How did you know that’s what I wanted to talk about?” And there was a part of me that really felt like he knew me. I felt cared for. So, while both brothers probably just wanted to care for me, one of those instances cut really deep.

Are you serious? Do you think that the only thing that can get a single guy so excited is some girl?

Guessing what someone will say might be accurate and even come off as discerning. However, I think that such speculation can result in much more harm than any potential good that it can accomplish. In 1 Corinthians 7:32, Paul says that, “the unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord.” What if, rather than just assuming that every single person is occupied with the thought of marriage, we assume what Scripture tells us – that an unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord. Although it won’t offer the same sensation, saying: “I had a feeling you were going to tell me about a girl when you came up to me,” after the fact is certainly a safer option.

“You need to marry______.”

I’ve literally had a brother come up to me, point at a sister in my church, and say: “You need to marry [her].”

It is clear that this brother thought very highly of me and this other sister. He just figured that it would be really cool if things could work out between us. But as you would imagine, this is extremely unhelpful.

Uhhhhh, please quit pointing. This is super awkward. So, am I just supposed to follow after your calling?

I don’t think that this is a common gesture. In fact, I’m certain that most people would cringe just reading this. But since it has happened to me, I will address this. 1 Corinthians 7:17 says: “Only let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to him, and to which God has called him.” I don’t think that there is ever an appropriate time to tell someone who they need to marry. It can be helpful to offer suggestions (if the person has asked) or maybe even try to set up situations where two saints might interact, but if God desires this relationship, He will be the one to call the single brother.

 “When you gon get married?”

As soon as a couple gets back from their honeymoon, they get asked the question: “So, when are you guys gonna have a baby?” And as soon as a single guy has been saved for longer than 2 months, they are sure to get the question: “When you gon get married?” This sounds ridiculous – two months must certainly be an exaggeration. But I have seen the conversion of three of my roommates, and like clockwork, this question came.

I’m not quite sure why this question is constantly asked. Maybe it’s because marriage just seems like the next step to life in the same way kids seem like the next step to marriage. And maybe in view of this present time, the Lord is leading many into marriage. But I think that the commonality of such a calling should not excuse the harmful pressure that this question can apply.

Again? How many people are going to ask me this? Maybe I should be thinking about marriage. I mean, everybody that I know is either married, in a relationship, or pursuing a relationship. If I don’t think about starting a family, does that mean that I don’t really care about the Kingdom – since the family is such a central institution for discipleship? But what about my sexual sin? Man, I really don’t want my sin to affect another person. I need to keep fighting. Why do people gotta keep asking me? Just another shameful reminder that I can’t overcome my sin.

I actually don’t think that this question is ever appropriate to ask. Consider the brother who you’d be asking. If they desire marriage, but are not currently pursuing marriage, then there is probably a reason. If it is because they have tried, and keep facing rejection, then asking this question will only rub an already painful wound. And if they are simply waiting on the Lord for victory against sexual immorality, this question can often lead to a feeling of shame and embarrassment. And if the brother doesn’t desire marriage, this question will only incite the pressure of needing to feel “normal”. In verse 27 of 1 Corinthians 7, Paul asks a completely different question and gives a response that we would probably never hear in our day: “…Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife.” Rather than speaking in a way that is culturally informed, might we seek to speak in a way that is biblically informed?

The Lord does use His people to exhort, give instruction, commend, counsel, and call other saints to obedience. But that instruction should accord with His Word.

I am aware that there are some single brothers who are complacent playing video games, who need to be pushed, and who need to be spurred on toward intentionality. But, that’s exactly what they need: an exhortation to be intentional and Christlike. They do not need an exhortation to get married. They need to be exhorted to present their bodies as living sacrifices. And if this means that they start pursuing a godly girl, praise the Lord!

* If you are reading this, and you have said some of these things to me, please know: I am not mad at you. I have felt cared for and loved and honored by you. I just think that our speech can be better informed by Scripture.